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The start of college can feel like a whirlwind of expectations, excitement and uncertainty for your child. You've heard it all: college is supposed to be the best time of their life, a magical period to find lifelong friends, face the biggest challenges and discover who they truly are. But as a parent with a child standing on the brink of this new chapter, the anticipation can be a double-edged sword. Will their first-year experience rise to meet the hype, or will the pressure of living up to these lofty promises leave them overwhelmed and disappointed?
Here's the truth: the first semester of college is a unique blend of opportunity and challenge. Success in this initial phase extends beyond academic achievement, which we, as parents, tend to overlook. It's a time for our children to lay the groundwork for their future, to explore new interests and to start carving out a path in their chosen field. While it's unrealistic to expect perfection, helping set your child up for success in their first year is critical to a good college career and involves strategic planning and a proactive mindset.
Related: Why Gen Z Should Still Go to College
Plan ahead
Although it may seem premature to map out your child's entire college journey right now, urging them to plan their four years early is crucial for staying on track and organized. You can help in this journey by offering advice and resources, but ensure your child is sitting in the driver's seat. By helping them turn their long-term goals into short-term plans, they can navigate each year with purpose and clarity.
While they should be making the major decisions, emphasize the importance of prioritizing academics in their first year. It's common for freshmen to flunk out their first year or struggle to pass their courses. However, it's completely avoidable if they decide to focus on their studies from the very start.
This is especially true for children living away from home for the first time, where the excitement of all this newfound freedom can be a distraction unless they're strict about maintaining their priorities. Regular check-ins can be helpful — without hovering — by asking how their studies are going, if they need more support, and whether they're meeting their own goals. The first year is often the biggest academic adjustment, so ensure you manage your expectations.
Encourage them to focus on developing good study habits and growing rather than chasing a perfect GPA. There will be plenty of time to aim for academic perfection in the following years, but putting that kind of pressure on them right away can be overwhelming as they adjust to a new workload and environment.
This foresight is particularly important for all you parents of grad school hopefuls, especially those hoping to get into med school, as your child will have certain pre-med prerequisites to complete before graduation. Help them plan their four years to ensure they take all the necessary courses and gain essential experiences like shadowing, volunteering, research, and other extracurriculars throughout their college career.
Related: Do Children Need to Go Out of State for the Real College Experience?
Step back to let them step up
As parents, we naturally want to protect our children and help them avoid mistakes. But college is where they will inevitably be pushed outside their comfort zone, so they must be prepared. You won't be there to remind them to complete assignments or clean their dorm. It's their responsibility to stay disciplined and organized. While you can still offer guidance and support, allowing your child to fight their own battles and learn how to recover from setbacks is essential for their success in college—and beyond.
A great way to foster this independence is by gradually stepping back during their senior year of high school. Let them manage their own schedules, make decisions about their priorities and handle deadlines on their own. This will help them shift away from the high school mentality and embrace the responsibilities of this new phase in their lives. Ultimately, for your child to succeed in college, they'll need to take ownership of their own success—and you'll need to trust them to do it! It's as much about you letting go of responsibility as it is about them stepping up to take it on.
Teach them how to manage their finances
College is only getting more expensive, so it's important your child knows how to manage their finances wisely from the start. Help them build a budget before they get to college, and urge them to stick to it! Look for opportunities to save, such as buying used textbooks or using online resources like BookBoon for free materials.
Financial literacy is a skill that many young adults lack but wish they had. It doesn't have to start in college and shouldn't! You can start in high school by walking them through managing a budget, understanding credit, and the importance of saving. Help them open a checking account and give them the responsibility of managing their debit or credit card, if they're old enough, keeping a close eye on spending limits. Developing these habits early will ensure they spend money wisely in their first year and throughout college, so they don't have to keep asking you for more money after spending it all on Uber Eats. Building good financial habits now will also help them avoid unnecessary debt and set a solid foundation for their financial future.
Final thoughts
While you can't prepare for every twist and turn of your child's first year of college, you can equip them with the tools for independence, encourage them to embrace their new responsibilities and share your valuable advice and support. This will help pave the way for their success and make this exciting new chapter feel less overwhelming for both of you. With thoughtful planning and a proactive mindset, they'll be able to define what success in college truly means to them, take ownership of their journey, and make the most of this transformative experience!
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